Rotten Tomatoes score: 63%
In psychological development, there are certain critical periods, during which a growing organism is uniquely suited to acquire particular skills. I think the same must be true for taste in certain movies. If you saw The Goonies when you were eight years old, you love it; if, like me, you missed it, you will never understand its appeal. I'm sure most people cannot comprehend how much I enjoy the Mighty Ducks trilogy, not to mention the Ernest canon. (Or maybe that last one is just me.)
When it comes to the National Lampoon Vacation series, I must have missed the boat. I didn't see any of these movies until I caught this one in German translation (where it's called Schöne Bescherung) at the age of 18. I finally saw the original Vacation about three years ago, along with its European sequel.
I thought the original, with Anthony Michael Hall playing Chevy Chase's son Russ, was pretty amusing, while European Vacation is an international atrocity that should have been banned by the Geneva Accords. This Christmas version came next, followed by Vegas Vacation in 1997, which is rightfully forgotten except for its introduction of the comedy pseudonym "Nick Papagiorgio." Apparently the trainwreck is still a-rolling, as new films have been released quite recently, all without Chevy Chase.
But today we're here to talk about Christmas Vacation. I watched this again a few weeks ago, so I have at least a vague recollection as to what happens in it.
The first two Vacations were about road trips, but in this one the Griswold family stays put while the vacation comes to them. My general view on gimmick sequels is that, once you've made two very high-concept movies in a series, it's very risky to make additional sequels that drop that concept. (That's why Die Hard 3 is such a disappointing sequel.) So once you've got two "Family of Morons on Vacation" movies in the can, it's going to be a rough adjustment making a "Family of Morons at Home" movie. And so it is, but the movie keeps its stride by cranking the moronicity dial way up to 11. There is nothing whatsoever to like about any member of the Griswold family, but it can be mildly amusing to watch them fail at the most basic tasks in life.
In the opening sequence, we see Chevy Chase nearly kill his entire family through gross incompetence behind the wheel. Later we see every adult member of his family struggle to figure out how to turn on a light switch. Someone locks Chevy in the attic, and in a McCallisteresque fit of obliviousness, the family leaves him there for hours. In a jewelry store, Chevy musters every ounce of effort to avoid staring at (and commenting on) a young floorwalker's chest, and spectacularly fails to utter a single sentence without an embarrassing slip.
How can these people be so stupid? How do they manage to feed themselves? How do they manage to dress themselves?
Actually, seeing Chevy Chase at work is one of the really funny parts of the movie, and it's a nice change from the earlier installments. His boss (Brian Doyle-Murray), a curmudgeonly Scrooge, is a funny character I wish we could have seen a lot more of. Chevy is expecting a big bonus this year because he's invented a "non-nutritive cereal varnish," which I found hilarious.
The rest of the movie is just a meandering story about the huge number of people in the Griswold house for Christmas. Beverly D'Angelo returns as Chevy Chase's inexplicably patient wife, a live-action Marge Simpson who should really just abandon ship. The two Griswold children, Russ and Audrey, have never been played by the same actors in any two Vacation movies—Russ is forgettable here, but Juliette Lewis as Audrey is relatably annoyed by the sheer volume of human bodies in her house. Randy Quaid is back as the insufferable Cousin Eddie. Aside from these, there are several hundred other family members who either didn't have any lines, or else I just didn't care enough to remember them. Oh, somewhere in there is a horrific scene where a cat disintegrates.
The whole holiday falls apart when Chevy learns that he isn't getting his Christmas bonus. Then, in a Hillbilly ex Machina ending, Cousin Eddie abducts the penny-pinching boss and brings him to the Griswold house. Suddenly, the boss has a complete change of heart and gives Clark an even bigger bonus than he was expecting.
I feel I've been unusually harsh on this movie, and that probably isn't fair. Like I said, the stuff about Clark's job is great, and the rest is just so-so. Only a few scenes are actively off-putting. I would be willing to watch it again.
1. Being around family is important at Christmas.
This is true even if no one in your family has any redeeming qualities.
2. If you want to install an outdoor swimming pool, you should spend money that you have.
I forgot to mention the part where Clark spends money he doesn't have on a pool. It wasn't worth mentioning.
3. "Non-nutritive cereal varnish" is funny.
This is a lesson for people who make Christmas comedies and are looking for suggestions about funny words and phrases. It's hilarious.
FALSE. Dana Barron, the original Audrey, reprised her role in the tour de force Christmas Vacation 2: Cousin Eddies Island Adventure (2003). As this will obviously be your next film review, a viewing of both films, consecutively, may be required.
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